You know you're a parent when...

You know you're a parent when...

• The last ten books you've read are "The Gruffalo", "The Secret Seven", "The Famous Five", "The Gruffalo", "The Gruffalo", "The Secret Seven's Adventure", "The Cat in A Hat", "The Gruffalo", "The Secret Seven Do It Again" and "The Gruffalo".
• You enter a library to give a talk to a group of adults, only to be sidetracked by a room full of toddlers singing "The wheels on the bus go round and round".
• (You hum "The wheels on the bus go round and round" for the rest of the day.)
• Your dinner repertoir consists of sausages, fish fingers and chicken nuggets.
• You refuse to read any books in which bad things happen to children.
• (You don't have time to read any adult books anyway.)
• As an author, you start censoring your writing in case your children get into the computer.
• You think it's more important for your children to be happy than for you to win the Orange Fiction Prize.
• You finish your blog post mid-sentence because your children call you down to -